BinaryWolf

Hairy Man in My Backyard!

Tags: Hairy Man Cactus

Men that Women Fantasize About

This is a 99% family friendly blog, however on rare occasion I stray off the reservation and add an “adult’ post, but NEVER intentionally something that is NSFW. So feel free to show this to your boss.

Hey! -I (Tiffany, a female journalist) need stories for an upcoming article for a major women’s magazine on what it feels like to have sex with different types of men that women fantasize or always wonder about, like:
…a professional athlete. Are his powers of endurance a wear-out or a win?
…a celebrity. Does all that charisma translate between the sheets?
…someone a foot shorter than you. Surely Prince isn’t the only 5′2″ man who has been with someone supermodel tall.
…a male model. When you shut your eyes, does the memory of his beautiful face add to your pleasure?
…someone older than your father.
…someone hardly old enough. He probably has stamina and enthusiasm for days, but at any point does your pleasure take a backseat to feeling like a cradle robber?
…a 40-year-old virgin. Or at least a 30-year-old one.
…a gynecologist.
…someone that doesn’t speak the same language as you. If the key to good sex is communication, what happens when you can barely say, “Hello, my name is?”

The quoted text above is taken from a mailing list that I belong to that aids journalists in finding people to interview for upcoming stories. Now I know what you ladies really want to read about!

Tags: women fantasize

Traffic Secrets - A Short Story

Once upon a time there was a young girl named Emily. Emily was 21 years old and lived in Traffic Secrets, California. While walking home from school one day, a white wolf jumped out from behind a tree and tackled Emily to the ground. But just when she was about to let out a scream for help, Emily realized that the white wolf was only licking her face, not trying to bite it off. At that moment, Emily decided to keep the white wolf as a pet. And on the way home she decided to name her pet white wolf “Traffic Secrets.”

When Emily and her new pet finally got home, guess who was standing on the front porch? That’s right, it was Emily’s mother, Jennifer. And boy was she surprised to see a white wolf following Emily into the yard! “What in world is that?” shouted Jennifer. “It’s a white wolf,” answered Emily. “Dah, I can see that, Emily, but what on earth is it doing here?” said Jennifer. “It’s my new pet!” answered Emily. “Oh you think so do you?” remarked Jennifer. “I wouldn’t get your hopes up. You know how your father hates white wolfs. But, well, I suppose you can keep him until your father comes home.” And with that Emily grabbed Traffic Secrets by the scruff of the neck and led her new pet into the house — even though she knew her father was probably going to dissaprove.

Once in the house, Emily and Traffic Secrets played and played, that is until Emily’s favorite television show, “Traffic Secrets,” started. At that point Emily forgot all about Traffic Secrets having an unsupervised run of the house. That is until half way through “Traffic Secrets,” when Emily was brought back to reality when she heard her father shout, “hijo de la manana! Emily! Get your tuchas in the office…NOW!!” With that Emily rushed into the office to see what all the fuss was about.

When she entered the office, there stood her father, Big John, pointing toward the chair. “Will someone please explain that?” asked her father. Then, as Emily followed her father’s finger to where it was pointing, she instantly knew what her father was so upset about. There, smack dab in the middle of the chair, was the biggest pile of wolf doo-doo she had ever seen! “I don’t EVEN want to know how that got there,” said Big John. “But you had better get it cleaned up now! And you had better get rid of whatever it is that could have done such a thing!”

Well, knowing her father as well as she did, Emily knew there was no sense even asking her father if she could keep Traffic Secrets for a pet. So without hesitation, Emily set out to find where Traffic Secrets was hiding.

After a few minutes of looking, Emily discovered Traffic Secrets crouched beneath the table that Emily did her crossword puzzles on. “Come on, Traffic Secrets, it’s time to find you a new home. And hey, don’t look at me that way, I’m not the one who did the dirty deed on the chair!” scolded Emily. “Thanks to you I’ll never get to have my own pet wolf!! And with that Emily led Traffic Secrets out of the house and down to the local Apple Store. Apple Store had a pet section and Emily knew the owner would find Traffic Secrets a good home. So after saying good-bye to Traffic Secrets, and thanking the owner of Apple Store, Emily walked backed home and attempted to drown her sorrows by slamming down a half dozen beers. But Emily’s pity party came to an abrupt end when her father reminded her about the mess she had neglected to clean up. And low and behold, midway through the clean-up, Emily suddenly became thankful that someone else was going to have to do it from now on.

Tags: John Reese's Traffic Secrets 2.0

1957 Plymouth Belvedere in Tulsa Update

Last year we posted about the unearthing of “Miss Belvedere”, the 1957 Plymouth Belvedere buried over 50 years ago in Tulsa, Oklahoma. A recent article about the rusty ‘57 Plymouth tells of efforts to clean it up to preserve it , but not to restore the car. Ultra One, a company that makes a rust remover that it touts as water-based and environmentally safe, will be doing the work. It’s not clear why the owners of the car are not fully restoring the car. Time, effort and money would be my guess.

Tags: 1957 Plymouth Belvedere, Tulsa, Oklahoma

Serendipity at the County Fair

We decided to attend the Del Mar Fair (aka the San Diego County Fair) on the very last day of the Fair this past Sunday. We planned to buy our discounted tickets a day in advance on Saturday. When we arrived at the grocery store we were told that there were no more discount tickets for sale, which wasn’t a complete surprise considering it was the last weekend of the Fair.

For those who would like to avoid parking fees, the Fair offers free, off-site parking and shuttle service. Public shuttles and buses will take you to and from the Fair. On Sunday we drove over to the Horsepark Equestrian Center to park our car as we had the done the last time went to the Fair. We parked on the dusty lot and walked over to the bus stop.

Right where you board the yellow school bus (the school bus seating wasn’t designed for tall people so my knees were up in my chest for the trip over to the Fair) is a ticket booth to purchase tickets in advance of arriving at the Fair entrance. I was just about to buy the tickets when I noticed the sign that read “cash only” sales. It was early enough in the day so I thought I’d wait till we got off at the entrance to wait in line to buy tickets with my credit card.

When we arrived at the Fair entrance, we were walking towards the ticket line when out-of-the-blue a guy tore off and handed us the 2 tickets you can see in the photo. I glanced back at him as we walked on and he wasn’t handing out tickets to anyone else. Initially, I thought they were some typical throw away marketing promotion, but upon closer examination they appeared to be genuine tickets. As we continued to walk towards the entrance, I asked a security guy if they were good and he said they were.

I looked back to see where the media-pass-guy was so I could walk back and thank him, but he was already walking away. Why he randomly picked us to give the tickets to remains a mystery, but we used the saved $24.00 entrance fee towards gifts for our family. Paying it forward so to speak. Thanks media-pass-guy!

Tags: San Diego County Fair

LinkedIn in Plain English

Common Craft explains LinkedIn in plain English. It isn’t about building connections, it’s about you being more productive. People networks are often hidden from view. Linkedin solves this problem by making professional connections visable.

Tags: LinkedIn

How to Beat the Recession with eCommerce

These exclusive educational videos will quickly give you the basics of using drop shippers in your eBiz. You’ll get a birds-eye view of how the entire product supply chain works. The videos are quick and easy to go through.

Tags: free drop shipping videos